


Two Minutes

by Authormitchel



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Speed Dating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-06-29
Packaged: 2018-11-21 05:14:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11350605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Authormitchel/pseuds/Authormitchel
Summary: Where Ginny convinces Harry to go speed dating with her, and then somehow gets matched with Snape.





	Two Minutes

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading. This is my first Harry/Snape fic, and I hope you all like it. I'm reading a lot of them right now, and just felt inspired. You can follow me on tumblr or send me an ask, thinkmyhappythoughts.tumblr. Love you. And Jo, if you're reading this. Tweet me, I have an idea.

Harry wondered why he agreed to this. People don’t often go to speed dating events with their newly minted lesbian exes, but as Ron said, Harry just had to be the exception.

It was a quiet little bar in London, not unlike some of the places Harry had tried to pick up people before. Harry had tried dating a few wizards, but it’s hard to keep up a romance when every new dalliance is front page news for “The Daily Prophet”. No, Harry thought, maybe Ginny was right to head out into the Muggle world though he still didn’t know how he felt about speed dating. 

“Remember you lot, two minutes then when you hear the bell you move onto the next person. So, be sure to use the time wisely. And smile. Tonight is mixed night,”

Harry turned to Ginny. “What’s mixed night?” 

Ginny smiled sheepishly. “So be nice to whichever guy or gal sits at your table.” 

“Sorry,” said Ginny, even as she eyed a tall brunette from across the room before the lady in charge separated them 

“Gin,” Harry stage whispered, but she was already moving on with the other group. One group, Ginny’s, would stay seated while Harry’s lucky group would move from table to table. A few men in his group looked handsome enough, thought Harry, before the woman announced that only people in the other group would be available for matches. 

But, that didn’t mean that Harry couldn’t ask for a number or two before it started. 

Just as he moved to talk to a rather attractive blonde, the woman popped her head back into the room. 

“They’re ready for you,” she announced.   
She assigned each of them a number, which corresponded with the table they were to sit at first. A yellow post it was slapped on Harry’s chest baring the number nine. He would sit at the ninth table then move on to ten then eleven, and so on until he got back to number nine. 

Then, if he happened to check someone who also checked him then they would get each other’s numbers and would be able to coordinate a date from there. 

“You have ten seconds to get to your seats before the clock starts.” Harry laughed, but the people around him weren’t fooling around. As soon as the lady gave the go ahead they trampled over him like a hoard of buffalos. And that was just the beginning. 

The first woman he met burst into tears after Harry asked about her last relationship and then sobbed for the next one minute and forty eight seconds. Harry had never been so glad to hear a bell ring. 

The first guy he met had seemed nice enough, but the second had automatically tried to feel Harry up. 

With his bare foot. 

Harry had jumped three feet in the air nearly knocking their table over in the process. Several heads turned in his direction, even more when he refused to sit back down until the bell rang and they changed tables. 

He spotted Ginny, at one point, noting happily, that she seemed to be having better luck than he was. Harry was sure her paper had several check marks where his was and would probably stay blank. 

And, it wasn’t that Harry was picky, because he wasn’t. He just wanted someone normal, someone smart, someone who had a passion, someone who wanted more than just the label of Harry Potter’s partner or Harry Potter’s sugar baby. He wanted someone he could talk to, someone who would call him out when he was being an idiot, someone like….

“Snape?” 

“Potter,” the other man replied quite civil, like it was ordinary for the two of them to run into each other at a speed dating even in Muggle London. 

Harry blinked. He wanted to say, “Snape” again and hope the man would give him some answers, but Harry doubted Snape would oblige. So, he sat down. 

“What are you doing here?” 

Snape gave him a look. 

“I’m doing what one does at a speed dating event, Potter. Dating.”

“You don’t date,” said Harry then realizing how rude that was…. “I mean, I didn’t know you dated.”

Snape rolled his eyes. 

“We have less than a minute. Now, if you want to waste that time babbling about whether I am in fact a human being who seeks comfort and companionship then feel free to do so, but be sure that I will be tuning you out.”

Okay then. 

Harry tried to remember some of the conversation openers he read in the other room, but could only come up with. “Dogs or cats?” 

Snape huffed before answering, “Cats.”

“Oh,” says Harry. “I like dogs.” 

Snape rolls his eyes. “I’ll be sure to tell Minerva when I see her next.”

Harry laughs. “Did you just make a joke?” But before Snape has a chance to answer the bell dings. Harry doesn’t want to go. He doesn’t know anything about Snape and hates that he’s going to miss the opportunity now. He moves tables reluctantly sorry he’ll miss the chance to ask Snape the rest of those inane questions. 

Chocolate or Vanilla? Seafood or Steak? City or Country? Beach or Museum?

Harry giggles at the thought of Snape on the beach, face streaked with white sun screen, bitching about the sun in his eyes and the sand in his shorts. 

He barely registers his new dates name when he hears Snape’s new date ask, “Dogs or cats?” 

And Harry can actually hear a small piece of Snape’s soul dying. Deciding to jump in before Snape actually kills someone, Harry leans over. 

“Dogs, he likes dog, big black dogs that drool a lot. He uses it for you know…..” Harry wags his eyebrows. 

The man looks disgusted.

Snape looks furious. 

The bell dings again but instead of everyone moving forward a seat everyone moves back one. No one seems surprised at this little development but Ginny and Snape who are both looking at Harry with confused expressions. 

Thankfully, Ginny just shrugs her shoulders. Snape on the other hand. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” Snape asks, as Harry sits back in the seat in front of him. 

“I’m getting my money’s worth. We didn’t get our full two minutes, and I didn’t get to ask you anything really so I just…”

“Used magic in front of a room full of Muggles because you didn’t get what you wanted.”

“Well,” said Harry feeling sheepish. “I….I.”

Taking pity on him, Snape continued, “If you ask me the rest of your questions will you then feel like you’ve gotten your due?”

“Yes,” Harry said feeling significantly happier. 

“Proceed,” replied Snape. 

“Chocolate or Vanilla?” Harry asked immediately. 

“Strawberry,” Snape answered, but Harry pushed on. 

“Morning or evening?” 

“Evening.”

“Blue or Green.”

“Green.”

“Okay, what about your taste in men?” 

“That’s not on the sheet, Mr. Potter.”

“Humor me,” said Harry. 

When Snape nodded, Harry continued. 

“Blonde or Brunette?”

“Brunette.”

“Taller than you or shorter than you?”

“Shorter.”

“Bulky or lean?”

“Lean.”

“Are you describing me on purpose, Severus?” asked Harry cheekily. 

“Anymore questions or no? Cause I believe I could…..”Severus reaches for his wand.   
Panicked this could end so soon, Harry quickly adds, “Top or Bottom?” 

Snape then gives Harry a look that has his cock hardening. 

“Do you mean which do I prefer or which position I would rather have you in?”

Correction, fully hard. 

“I uh,,,I,”

Then the bell dinged. Snape made a show of pocketing his wand as Harry was ushered out of his seat by a burly blond. And before he knew it time was up, and he only had one X marked on his paper. 

Table number eighteen. Snape. 

Now, if he only had a match. He busied himself with a trip to the washroom and a call to Ron and Hermione before hopping in line to see if he had a match. Looking around for Snape it was clear that Snape had already had his ticked check and went home, or worse, went home with someone else. He had kept one eye on Snape for the rest of the night and hadn’t seen the man show interest in anyone else, but Severus Snape was one hard man to read. 

“Waiting for someone, Mr. Potter?” And darn it if his cock didn’t twitch at the sound of Snape’s voice. 

“Not really,” replied Harry. “Just waiting to see if I have any matches.”

“Check a lot of people did you?”

“Only one,” Harry answered. Did Snape sound jealous or was his hopeful thinking getting the better of him? 

“What about you?” Please say him. Please say him. 

“No,” Severus said. “I don’t think I’m much for speed dating.” That answers that then. Harry might as well rip up his ticket. Deciding to just follow Snape out the door, Harry turns to leave. 

“Not going to see if that person checked you back or not?”

“Nah,” Harry said, non-committal. “Not going to meet my husband at a speed dating event am I?” Harry laughed, but Severus didn’t. 

“And why not?”

Harry stuttered. 

“Well, not very romantic is it?” 

“Need something to tell all the little Potters in the future?” 

Only if they’re yours, his mind supplied. Harry blushed. 

They walked down the street to the apparition point in companionable silence until….

“You never answered my question,” Severus spoke up. “Wha….” Severus moved in front of him. “Top or bottom, I believe the question was..”

Harry gaped at him. 

Snape answers, “I don’t really have a preference, but I think I would with you. It would be a shame to not try out that lithe auror’s body, to test your stamina.” 

Harry held back the, “Yes, Professor,” in his throat, not entirely sure that would help his cause. “Measure your stamina, your finesse as you fucked me.”

“Yeah,” said Snape, smirking as he noticed Harry’s slack jawed expression. “I think I would really, really like that.” 

“Okay,” said Harry feeling brave. 

He leaned in and Snape allowed Harry to brush his lips against his.   
Harry spoke up, “But you will not tell our future children that we met at a speed dating event.” 

Sna….Severus leaned in and kissed him again. 

“Deal.”


End file.
